Enough said . . .

Guess this is what I’m supposed to do today . . .

A Curmudgeon’s work is never done!

Wall to Wallpaper Aggravation

I may have ranted on this before, but there are few things in this world that I dislike more than removing wallpaper. Oh sure there is stripping period woodwork that some ne’er-do-well painted back in the 50’s or 60’s but for my current house the scourge has been the endless removal of wallpaper.

We bought the house from an older women and we knew that we wanted to redecorate which meant at minimum removing wallpaper – lots of wallpaper from all but a single room in the house. Initially we did the main floor with the help of visiting family members – thanks for visiting! Three years on I continued, finishing all but the one room last year.

Tomorrow I start the last room in our house that has wallpaper. I will begin by visiting the home improvement store before the light of day to buy wallpaper remover, get the garden sprayer out of the shed, bring in the putty knives and drop cloths, and will end the day just before teaching two online bridge classes by cussing and swearing out the sticky parts of the paper and anyone who has ever perpetrated such an affront to plaster walls.

Of course I will still have to patch and prime the walls, before finally getting to give them a final coat of paint.

And if I don’t like the final color, I will simply go buy another gallon of paint.

How civilized!

Taking a Breath

After the events of last week even the curmudgeon needs to take a deep breath and say a prayer of thanksgiving and hope for our country.

We need to stop the spread of this virus that is killing our fellow citizens and we need to stop the virus of fear and hate that is killing our humanity.

We need to come together to beat the one and realize the other.

I may not agree with your politics, but I acknowledge your human dignity and respect you for it.

Breathe deep!

Normal Guy’s Food Critic – RJ’s Meats

You might wonder why in the midst of a pandemic and 50% indoor dinning capacity and carryout, that the Normal Guy’s Food Critic has stepped out of the frying pan of obscurity and back into the culinary fire. Well all it took was a completely other-world experience. Meet RJ’s Meats.

That’s right a meat market in Hudson Wisconsin does takeout of ready to heat and serve food and I’m not just talking about chops and steaks. RJ’s has host of oven ready entries which are clearly a cut above the normal grocery store frozen section that include BBQ Chicken, BBQ Pork, shredded beef, meatloaf, and a unique ham loaf. But on my last trip to Hudson and much to the delight of my German roots I discovered it included Rouladen too!

Full disclosure, I first met Rick Reams, founder of RJ’s, 14 years ago. Rick is one of the most authentic and joy filled people I have ever encountered in my life. Rick is not only a butcher but also world class sausage maker and he has the internationally won awards to prove it. Despite my leaving Hudson several years ago, I still make a monthly pilgrimage to RJ’s for grillables and sausages, especially the andouille sausage which I use in various cajun dishes. Always there are packages of baked rolls and buns to top off the bag at checkout – so very tasty fresh out of the oven! The baking is headed up by Anne, is Rick’s better half, and together with their son Anthony they are the family backbone of RJ’s.

On my last trip to RJ’s I was delighted to have the opportunity to chat with Rick. As always Rick had something on his phone to show me and after a little Q&A of the joys of pounding Schnitzel meat in the kitchens of German restaurants, he showed me a video of a Schnitzel press. It was the neatest thing I’d seen turning a labor of physical endurance into the perfect schnitzel meat in seconds. And yes, Rick had it and they now were selling Schnitzel ready to fry/bake. My wife, a Schnitzel lover, was hooked and ready to give it a try. In the conversation, I mentioned my favorite German dish at the local German restaurant (the Winzer Stube, rated one of the 5 best in the country) was the Rouladen. Rick said, “We’ve got that too.” So in the end we went off with our ready to heat entries, andouille, and old fashion skin on wieners.

Well, I can report that we pan fried the Schnitzel and served it with mashed potatoes and gravy – forgot to buy red cabbage – and it was awesome! As good as any Schnitzel I’ve ever had and I’ve had my share.

Fast forward to the end of the week and the oven ready Rouladen was heated and served with homemade spaetzle – once again forgot to buy red cabbage. It was the perfect mixture of spice, pickles, onions, bacon, and beef the notes of each coming through in a harmonious chord!

Now if I can just find the time to get back to RJ’s in Hudson sooner than next month to bring home some more takeout!

Open Societies . . . an Epiphany

Do we really want to live in an “open” society?

The answer to that question depends on who’s society we are talking about. In the United States we have returned to the society of the rugged individual or cowboy mentality. Our “open” society of today is much like the old west, might makes right, white makes right, vigilantism subverts the rule of law because the law is not effective enough for some. The outcome of this “open” society is predictably what we saw on January 6, in Washington,DC. Left unchecked the logical extension of this “open” society would be to ship everyone of non-European decent back to where they came from – apologies to native Americans – and establish a pure “American” society.

Sounds a bit familiar to be sure for those of us that actually learned about the history of Nazi Germany. But I digress, almost no one actually paid any attention in history class – sooo boring!

I grew up in a different “open” society. One shaped and controlled by the greatest generation. It was a society that today’s republicans would call socialist by most measures. It was anything but socialism if you happened to be gay, native American, black, or a woman. Those folks were effectively marginalized from the social mainstream – they knew their places and we had social structures in place to keep them there. Today we call the remnants of those social structures systemic racism and economic injustices. I can tell you one thing for sure; life was better than good for a poor white boy growing up in the midwest in that society. White privilege meant, that despite being poor, I could still get a good education and actually have a real shot at attaining the “American” dream.

Then came the cultural revolution fueled by protest over the Vietnam War we saw on the positive side the civil rights movement, feminist movement, and gay pride parades. As with any revolution there were many casualties and battles including freedom riders, the Stonewall Riots, the siege at Wounded Knee and the assassinations of Robert Kennedy, Martin Luther King Jr., and Harvey Milk.  Society had begun to see the marginalized and had also begun to include them – at least symbolically – at the table. The society was now considered progressive and “open” at least on the surface.

Next up was the digital revolution. Gone was the need for authority on the world wild web. Anyone could post anything they could imagine and purveyors of fringe ideas and ideologies could find like minded individuals to prove they were not fringe anymore but normal. Add in the engine of social media and our culture of celebrity and we quickly became a society the allowed for QAnon and neo-Nazis to spew the biggest pile of crap since Babe the Blue Ox actually made cow pies. Into this “open” digital society place a billionaire TV reality show host as president and – well you know the rest.

Now under threat of losing their Section 230 immunity from prosecution the social media platforms and on-line marketeers are finally policing the content of their sites. Cries from the extremes of first amendment censorship ring hollow against the violence we witnessed last week.

I guess our “open” society isn’t really that “open” after all.

New Year’s Predictions

Warning: you might not like these.

The Dark Side:

• I predict that the winners of Georgia’s runoff will be Ossoff and Loeffler.
• Mitch McConnell will remain as Senate Majority leader.
• There will be firefights in the streets of Washington on January 6.
• The $600 you got will be the last stimulus check you’ll see before May and there will be no more unemployment extensions.
• 500,000 U.S. citizens, wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, and children will die from Covid-19 and its complications before June.
• You can’t even imagine the chaos and violence of social and political justice demonstrations this summer.

I pray to God that everything I predicted so far is 100% wrong! However, given human nature and psychology we all ought to be on our knees every day praying for a miracles.

Some Brighter Predictions:

• We will rejoin the Paris Climate Accord.
• There will be a tax increase on the wealthy.
• The Covid-19 vaccine rollout will get slightly faster but it will be at least June or July before the general population will be able to get shots.
• Mitch McConnell will step down as Senate Majority lead by year’s end due to health considerations.
• You will be able to visit family and friends for the holidays.

Snowblowers

Ok I’ve got a gripe – snowblowers! And don’t give me any of that PC crap about calling then snow throwers. They were and still are snowblowers in my book so that’s what I’ll calling those dastardly despicable machines.

Here is the deal: My father bought a snowblower in 1964. It was a 6hp Gilson with electric start sold under a Montgomery Wards name plate for you true aficionados. Well, I repaired and cajoled that beast for 50 years only replacing drive belts. In 2014 I had enough repairing and bought a brand spanking new snowblower even though my dad’s still ran sans any safety devices. The new machine was 30 inches wide for my long exurban driveway with push button chute controls and heated hand grips. I thought I’d died and gone to snow shoveling heaven.

Point in fact, new snowblowers are not the beasts that the old ones were. Not wanting to damage my expensive new machine I did better at maintenance but not much. Then it happened, last year after only 5 years of service I had to replace the spark plug. Mind you, the spark plug in my dad’s snowblower was still original equipment. Given the early failure of the spark plug I decided that this fall I would go through the manual and perform ALL the recommended maintenance on my machine. In the process the carburetor turned into an issue and unable to successfully rebuild it, I purchased a brand new one but better to be safe than snowed under.

We had two early snows in October and the snowblower worked great! Then came November and the first two weeks of December – nothing. Finally, just before Christmas it happened, a real snowstorm replete with blizzard conditions. No problem, I was ready!

You guessed it, the *@&!@#%&* snowblower wouldn’t start. The temperature was dropping rapidly below zero as I took out my 30-year-old steel snow shovel and dug my way through the snow and the snowplow mountain at the end of the driveway. Days later when it warmed up a bit I discovered that the culprit this time was a short in the on/off switch. Just another part to replace!

Snowblowers, they really do blow!

Christmas Shopping

Back in the day when the Curmudgeon was gainfully employed, I loved Christmas shopping. What you say? The Curmudgeon loved Christmas shopping?  Well let me explain for those of you too young to remember life without online shopping at the click of a mouse or cell phones surgically attached to our hands.

Originally, although I loved giving presents to my friends and family, I hated Christmas shopping. I would head to the stores along with every other obsessed Christmas shopper. On one trip to a mall I was even physically attacked by a woman using her child in a baby stroller as a battering ram to get through a crowd of shoppers. That was the end of the road for me. I promised I would never wait until December to do my Christmas shopping.

Well as fate would have it, I forgot that resolution as my work life sped out of control the following year and found myself on Christmas eve with no presents to put under the family Christmas tree. With the office Christmas buffet just spread out I stuffed a couple of cookies into my pocket and headed to – you guessed it – the mall.

Noon on Christmas eve and to my surprise the mall parking lot was half empty. My entry into Daytons/Marshall Field/Macys (elaborated for the generationally challenged) was transformative. I was greeted by a store employee asking me if she could help me find something. Where did everyone go? It was like having a personal shopper! I was escorted from one department to another. In each department another employee would guide me through the maze of features, sizes, and colors. Remember, I couldn’t call or text anyone a picture of a potential purchase to get their opinion or input.

Christmas shopping complete, I was escorted to the “Gift Wrapping” department! There two very cheerful older women – well I wouldn’t call them older now – gave me via observation a great lesson in gift wrapping that has served me well ever since. Finally, wrapped presents in hand I was off to my home just in time to help put out our Christmas eve buffet.

My observation was that almost the only shoppers in the mall that day were men. They like were late, clueless, and being men in a mall a bit laid back. No rushing, no hassles, no problems. The store employees were in cool down mode after the workout of the holiday season we were putty in the hands of professionals. I became a Christmas eve shopper by choice after that day. Well at least until the advent of online shopping. Still, I miss that Christmas experience!

God rest ye merry department stores and real customer service!

Home for the Holidays – Humbug!

There is no place like home for the holidays, or so the song goes. That may be true most years when our home is bustling with friends and family gatherings. Even visiting neighbors, family, and friends in their homes can be considered part of our extended home. And don’t forget the holiday parties hosted by employers, clubs, and community organizations. Yes, home is certainly a wonderful place for the holidays – most years. However, 2020 is serving us one more kick in the pants for this year’s holiday season. It even dares us to gather at a time when our hospitals are at and beyond capacity to care for those of us who choose to defy the odds of a viral pandemic and act totally without regard for anyone beyond themselves.

I have been working from “home” since April. My social interaction is largely curtailed to going to the grocery store now that the outdoor home improvement season has come to an end. At the grocery store people largely ignore you and pretend you are not there unless you get too close, then they recoil. Even when I’m out for a walk the other walkers have become more and more unfriendly over time. Now they largely refuse to say “Hi” from beneath their masks or even wave a simple acknowledgment to my cheerful greeting. We are becoming not only an angry and divisive society but a fearful and cold one too.

No wonder I am having a hard time getting into the “holiday spirit.” I blew my shofar at Rosh Hashanah, put out my Advent wreath, decorated the house, set up my Christmas tree, and lit my Menorah, but still no holiday glow.

Yesterday I watched A Christmas Carol, the George C. Scott version but it doesn’t really matter which version I watch, it always brings a tear to my eye. This year was no different. It was then I realized that what put me in the holiday spirit is the joyful spirit of people sharing care, cheer, and laughter with one another.

Being a member of the vulnerable set, I’m staying home for Christmas so I’ll avoid the cheer and laughter of others – this year. Still acknowledging that when we care for others beyond ourselves, we are “good as gold and better.”  I will get out my checkbook and spread an extra dose of care for the many in need. It is the least I can do.

God bless us, everyone!

Advent of a New Year

The observance of the Christian season of Advent dates back to the 5^th century. It is a time of personal reflection and reconciliation in preparation for the Feast of the Incarnation, Christmas. A time when Christians are to spiritually prepare for the celebration gift of God’s unconditional love for humankind, Jesus. It is a time to pay attention and to prepare for Jesus’ second coming as well.

This year we are not only in the spiritual season of Advent but we are – or should be – preparing for the advent of two great gifts. The first gift is that of a vaccine for the Covid19 virus. We need to prepare not only to distribute and to vaccinate people on a massive scale but we need to prepare for the gift of a more normal society. Foremost is what each of us can do to prepare: stay home when you have any symptoms, don’t gather with anyone outside the people you live with, wear a mask when outside your residence, wash your hands.  That way we CAN get to the other side of this pandemic. We need to stop the self-destructive pointless individualism and realize that we are all in this together. What I chose to do can and will affect you. Be still and know that I really and truly want you to live – even if I disagree with your political views.

We are also awaiting the second gift in the new year of a new government. We need to prepare to work together to rebuild our country after the devastation of the pandemic in 2020. So many people out of work. So many small businesses bankrupt. So many people hungry. So many people homeless. So many people grieving the loss of loved ones to the virus. We need to work at being kind to one another. We need to work at being supportive of one another in our recoveries. We need to prepare to hold our government to accountable for the common good of our people and the health of our planet. One is truly irrelevant without the other.

So please take this season of Advent and prepare for all of us to have a brighter tomorrow.